Lost in Penang...
So here I'm, sitting alone in the hotel cafe where I'm staying in at Penang, waiting for my friends to pick me up after a late night out. It's an odd feeling: it's a great place, & I enjoy the trip immensely, but yet I'm bogged down by the discussion we had yesterday during the long drive to source out biz opportunities in various places.
We started talking about how simple/fun life were back then in melb, & that we should start making plans to go back there, both for hols & when we retire later on. Came back to the hotel later that night, and I was reminded of Dee’s words, something to the tune of that it’s not about the place itself, but more about the companionship that happened in that place.
Just a few months ago, I was counting the people whom I’d definitely make the effort to meet up with if/when I’m back at melb, those ppl that really defined my four year stay there. Right now, I can’t even use up all of my left hand’s fingers, so it really shows how much has changed since then. I barely had any contact with those ppl I treasured the most, & I swear I have tried my best to reach out to them… but there’s always just the disappointment in the end.
As much as I miss melb, I think it’s the events that happened that made it so much more memorable…. & I’m really reluctant to go back right now, lest it spoils the beautiful memories it has engraved in my mind. Maybe it’s the fear that no one will actually care/notice if I’m there, or that subconsciously I know that those wonderful times were history, and it won’t ever be repeated again. I don’t even know what is the purpose of going back anymore, although I do miss the food & the erratic weather terribly.
Makes me feel as though I’ve lost my second home, the refuge house that I always thought I could count on when I’m down. Apparently that house has been getting its own new occupants when I’m wandering overseas aimlessly, & there won’t be a place anymore when the prodigal son returns….
Can’t help but to feel that I’ve lost both my heart & soul…
We started talking about how simple/fun life were back then in melb, & that we should start making plans to go back there, both for hols & when we retire later on. Came back to the hotel later that night, and I was reminded of Dee’s words, something to the tune of that it’s not about the place itself, but more about the companionship that happened in that place.
Just a few months ago, I was counting the people whom I’d definitely make the effort to meet up with if/when I’m back at melb, those ppl that really defined my four year stay there. Right now, I can’t even use up all of my left hand’s fingers, so it really shows how much has changed since then. I barely had any contact with those ppl I treasured the most, & I swear I have tried my best to reach out to them… but there’s always just the disappointment in the end.
As much as I miss melb, I think it’s the events that happened that made it so much more memorable…. & I’m really reluctant to go back right now, lest it spoils the beautiful memories it has engraved in my mind. Maybe it’s the fear that no one will actually care/notice if I’m there, or that subconsciously I know that those wonderful times were history, and it won’t ever be repeated again. I don’t even know what is the purpose of going back anymore, although I do miss the food & the erratic weather terribly.
Makes me feel as though I’ve lost my second home, the refuge house that I always thought I could count on when I’m down. Apparently that house has been getting its own new occupants when I’m wandering overseas aimlessly, & there won’t be a place anymore when the prodigal son returns….
Can’t help but to feel that I’ve lost both my heart & soul…
posted by leonhart @ 1:45 PM
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